1,200 Quotes, and counting…

I just updated the Simpson’s random quote generator on the site with a bunch of new quotes. We’re now up to just over 1,200 hand-selected, pre-screened, gut-busting quotes. Go ahead, refresh the page. There are new gems waiting just for you!

Also, because of my extremely generous nature, if anyone else would like to have the generator on their site, just let me know and I’ll send you the files. It’s a simple wordpress plugin. You could also customize it pretty easily to do quotes from other shows (but why would you want to!).

And Heidi, we need to talk. Come on! You can’t have a Simpson’s quote generator on your site and just name it “Random Quote”. As Ralph would say, “I’m bemarrassed for you”. Get Marky to jazz it up for you (and while he’s at it, you should get him to make the backgrounds of the images transparent. This is a classy plugin, after all).

I’ll leave you with a few of the best of the ones I just added.

Lisa: Do we have any food that wasn’t brutally slaughtered?
Homer: Well, I think the veal might have died of loneliness.

Homer: I’ll do the dishes when I pick it out of the chore hat and it’s not a practice. See, there it is. But that was just a practice. The system works!

Bum: Well, there are six schools of begging: bad musician, messed up vet, cripple, fake cripple, religious zealot, and crazy guy. I think you would do well with crazy guy.
Homer: Coke and Pepsi are the same thing! Wake up, people! [gibberish]
Bum: Wow, now, that is good crazy!

Kent Brockman: Springfield will have its first annual “Do What You Feel” festival this Saturday, whenever you feel like showing up. It will be a welcome change from our “Do As We Say” festival, started by German settlers in 1946.

Mr. Burns: Now a few more details about this year’s company picnic. It’s at the plant, no food will be served, the only activity will be work, and the picnic is canceled.

Martin’s Mother: While my son’s at fat camp, I cleaned out his room. How much will you give me for this? [hands Comic Book Guy a box]
Comic Book Guy: Probably nothing but let us see… Oh, a handwritten script for Star Wars, by George Lucas? Princess Leia’s anti-jiggle breast tape! Film reel labeled “Alternate Ending – Luke’s Father Is Chewbacca”!!! Oh! Oh!… [calms down] I’ll give you five dollars for the box.

Dr. Nick: With my diet, you can eat anything you want, any time you want!
Marge: And you’ll lose weight?
Dr. Nick: Uhh, you might. It’s a free country!

Rod: Is he killing that guitar, daddy?
Ned: Yes, son.

Principal Skinner: I know Weinstein’s parents were upset, Superintendent, but I was sure it was a phony excuse. I mean, it sounds so made up, “Yom Kip-pur.”