Mothers And Daughters

Today I went Visiting Teaching and was in charge of sharing a lesson. Since April was General Conference I got to choose the message. So in honor of Mother’s Day I chose the talk by Elder Ballard, Mothers and Daughters. After reading the talk and then presenting it three times this morning, I just had to share some of my favorite parts.

It’s hard to find our place as women in the world when so often we are berated for standing up for morals and values. Elder Ballard reminds us of the sacred role we play in Heavenly Father’s plan and of the respect the priesthood leaders of the church have for women: “It is, unfortunately, all too easy to illustrate the confusion and distortion of womanhood in contemporary society. Immodest, immoral, intemperate women jam the airwaves, monopolize magazines, and slink across movie screens—all while being celebrated by the world. The Apostle Paul spoke prophetically of “perilous times” that will come in the last days and specifically referenced something that may have seemed particularly perilous to him: “silly women laden with sins, led away with divers lusts” (2 Timothy 3:1, 6). Popular culture today often makes women look silly, inconsequential, mindless, and powerless. It objectifies them and disrespects them and then suggests that they are able to leave their mark on mankind only by seduction—easily the most pervasively dangerous message the adversary sends to women about themselves.”

Message I most want my daughters and nieces to hear, because it’s so true. I can see this clearly now about my own mother, but I wasn’t always so sure (love you mom!): “Love your mother, my young sisters. Respect her. Listen to her. Trust her. She has your best interests at heart. She cares about your eternal safety and happiness. So be kind to her. Be patient with her imperfections, for she has them. We all do.“

For all mothers of daughters and sons this is crucial. Everything we say and do goes into their heads and is processed. As my dear friend recently reminded me, they may not seem to be listening or watching, but they are; So we should fill their heads with positive things: “Let me assure you that even when you think your daughter is not listening to a thing you say, she is still learning from you as she watches you to see if your actions match your words. As Ralph Waldo Emerson is believed to have said, “What you do speaks so loud that I cannot hear what you say.”

Some reminders of the things Mothers can do to raise daughters of faith:

• …avoid the temptation to gossip or judge one another
• A mother-daughter relationship is where a daughter learns how to nurture by being nurtured.
• …(teach) the importance of making covenants, and then show them how to keep those covenants in such a way that they will desire to live worthy to go to the temple.
• Immodest, unchaste women are glamorized and all too often celebrated and emulated….You need to have frequent, open discussions during which you teach your daughters the truth about these issues.
• …learn how to recognize the presence and the voice of the Spirit.
• Point them to the scriptures.
  
• Give them experiences that will help them cherish the blessing of priesthood power in their lives.
• God will truly hear and answer their prayers.
• if needed, teach them how to repent and how to remain pure and worthy.

The thesis for Elder Ballard’s talk: “I hope you are listening and see a pattern and hear a steady, consistent message that in these last days it is essential—even critical—that parents and children listen to and learn from one another. These are not just ethereal concepts about which I have been speaking. They are the essence, the center, of God’s plan for our eternal happiness and peace.”

Hunter graduates from primary soon, and we enter the world of  “the youth.” I hope and pray that this is a time of learning and growth for him, and his parents, as he figures out the man he wants to become: “…the home is the most important place to prepare the youth of today to lead the families and the Church of tomorrow. It rests upon each one of us as mothers and fathers to do all we can to prepare our youth to be faithful, righteous men and women. It is in the home where we must teach the gospel by precept and by example.”

The Mutual theme for 2010 applies to our youth as well as to all of us: “Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the Lord thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest” (Joshua 1:9).

Elder Ballard closes with this beautiful quote from President Joseph F. Smith that reminds me why families and motherhood are so important: “…We form associations and relations for time and all eternity. . . . Who are there besides the Latter-day Saints who contemplate the thought that beyond the grave we will continue in the family organization? the father, the mother, the children recognizing each other..? this family organization being a unit in the great and perfect organization of God’s work, and all destined to continue throughout time and eternity?”

To listen to this talk click here.